Last Days

I cannot express enough in words how lightened my heart is by the fact that three hours from now I will be done with classes for the semester. Finals week is almost a light at the end of this weeks long dark and dank tunnel. (*giggle* I'm making rhythmic patterns on the space key to "Brighter than sunshine" as I think)

After yesterdays soggy dreariness (that left my feet more a prune than they have ever been in my entire life of long baths) the earth smells like memories of Shelter Gardens. Pine, wet earth and a blend of all manner of green things. I could close my eyes and imagine myself elsewhere were it not for the intrusive sounds of campus construction. It seems that I am doomed to be followed by an incomplete state of refurbishment. First Hickman High, now Mizzou. Life in a constant state of costly upgrades.

Several people have told me that I am a good writer. Complements are always encouraging. And I am great full for them If only these people read my more modest self which dwells in the pages of my journal and my black notebook(yes, the black notebook has returned in full force...for some time actually-see December 6th and 7th 2006 entries). It's less than lovely. More of a raw self rather than the polished one I usually present here. Not that I'm not honest here, just in a less random erratic and more eloquent way. Different faces for the same person. I think it's healthy to be a little multi-colored. The same people that tell me that I am a good writer say that I should so more with it. I've tried this before and it usually starts out good and then comes to a screeching halt. It's because I don't have the patience to get through that hard parts. But I think that this summer I'll try again and maybe see it through to some kind of end thins time. Who knows...we'll see.

And I have to mention how sad it made me that on Myspace I'm not even in any of my few friends top 20. I actually don't care that much about Myspace, but I had an irrational wave of unlovedness for a few moments there worth noting because it was so silly of me.