Dreams

I woke up at 8:00 in the morning today to my radio alarm feeling an odd mixture of relief and bewilderment at what had just occured in my mind. Because of the way I like to gradually awake myself, I often remember the dreams that I have in the 15 min incraments between wakings. Usually I just roll over and sleep again where the dream becomes a blurry haze that I am lucky to get written down in detail later. To be different, today I began to write as soon as I woke up. Not an easy task. The dream had been so vivid and real. It involved me being in a bar drinking wine and beer ith Robin Wiliams, Cameron Diaz and Amy Lee. It was all very strange. And the guilt I felt for drinking and getting drunk was so real...it was quite horrifying.

Usually when I dream there is this little corner of conciousness that is the wakeful Sarah Lambson. The one that tells me that it's okay because it's just a dream. It's also the oart of me that says "WAKE UP" when something gets too uncomfrotable. This part of me has been dead for the last week or two and my brain has problems distinguishing between reality and the working of my midnight mind. Even when I am really awake. I feel like that Star Trek Eposide "Frame of Mind" (thanks to my nerd brother for the title) where Commander Riker cant distinguish his true reality. It's kind of distressing sometimes. I actually thought that I had missed a whole day. On monday morning I had dreaed that I worked that evening and when I awoke to shower, I really believed that it was tuesday and had no Idea where my monday had gone. strange...and sometimes creepy.