Sarah needs to be packing. There is so much. My bed has already been re-located to it's current resting place: the basement. And so I sit on the floor. I wonder when I learned to sit cross-legged? I had to be pretty young because they make you do that all through elementary school.
In other words I am taking this opportunity to procrastinate.
Thank you for sharing it with me.
This is the last night that I will spend in Columbia for 10 months. How do I feel about that? You would think I would be excited. The truth is, these knots refuse to leave. There are stretched of time where I am s distracted that I hardly notice. Then I come home again and realize just how big a step this is in my humble existence. There are no parties. Nothing exciting. No big bang. I simply drift away from the home that has been my mainland for the past 22.5 years.
Somebody tell me that I am doing the right thing.
No, don't. Because the only one that can know if this is right is me. It may turn out that this is all wrong. But I will endure because I need to grow up. No more crutch. No more pretending that I'm not really an adult. Not yet. I still feel like a child but with none of the innocence and simplicity. I'm in the worst kind of limbo.
I have two more nights to spend in blissful familiarity. I suppose I should be glad that I'm not going oversees into some harsh country where I don't even speak the language.
Enough of this. I just needed to put some thoughts down. As I said before I went into Rhode Island, who knows how many opportunities I will have to blog out there (Of course I had plenty in Rhode Island but the office I spent time in had internet.).
Happy snowy Wednesday everybody.
The place where I go to find myself again when I am lost. My Zen garden if you will.
1 comment:
Friday, we had an introduction/inservice on a book called Deep Survival. While I don't think you are going to be so shell-shocked by the change to NH that it will be like ultimate survival mode for you, I do want to share one tidbit of information gained from the workshop: Enjoy the survival journey. Granted, there will be times when it may just suck- but sucky or not, you will grow, and I know you will grow in positive ways, so find a way to enjoy the journey, because these particular experiences will never come again... Love you! ;)
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